No matter what happens

No matter what happens to the Earth and/or mankind, let's always remember that for a moment, however brief, we had blogs.

So this guy.... (pt 1)

So this guy is walking down the street, right? And he's a regular guy. He's not particularly handsome but he's certainly not ugly. Non-descript sounds perjoraitve in some sense so let's not call him that. The guy walking down the street is neither handsome nor homely yet also isn't non-descript. He is pretty average but not so average that you couldn't remember him if you met him four or five times and the street he is walking down is a sidestreet that runs through a neighborhood in north east Los Angeles called Los Feliz. The street is called Rodney and everytime the guy walks down this street he thinks of Rodney Dangerfield and how much he really needs to call his uncle who is a huge fan of the movie Back to School and is sick or something. None of that matters, the point is this guy - this regular looing but not in a bad way guy who isn't close with his family is walking down the street and he comes to a crosswalk at an intersection and he needs to cross to the other side and there are no cars coming but he stands there because he heard that LAPD is cracking down on jaywalking and he really can't risk $73 just to get across the dumb street twenty seconds faster. Other people jaywalk and the guy figures he might as well and he steps into the cross walk at almost the exact moment the walk sign comes on and he wonders why he's always the one who follows the rules. Anyway, the guy crosses the street and and heads south on Vermont avenue and this makes him think about how he's never been to Vermont and does he even care? When he was ten or whatever he probably dreamed about visiting all fifty states but now it just seems futile and exhausting. What could Vermont possibly have that he needed to see? He was heading to a movie at a small theater that showed art house and mainstream films and smelled like cheese feet. He figured seeing a movie wouldn't do him any harm.

He had no idea how wrong he was. 

to be continued. 

Hey Good Lookin, What You Got Cookin'?

If you drop a fried chicken leg on the ground and an entire garden salad on the ground ants will immediately swarm the chicken and completley ignore the salad.

SO WHY AREN'T THEY FAT!?

The thing is...

There are two types of people in the world.

Those who believe there are two types of people in the world and those who know better.



FILE UNDER MIND BLOWN!

This Post Could Be Your Band

I once complained that I had no shoes
until I met a man who had no feet

And I took his shoes since he didn't need them.

checkmate, optimists.

A parable about work...

The LIttle Red Hen


The little red hen was going to make some bread so she asked all the farm animals "who will help me plant the seed." They were all like "not me" and shit so the red hen planted the seeds by herself.

She did the same thing when it came time to reap the harvest, mill the wheat, knead the dough, bake the bread and etc. At every step she asked "who wants to help?" and the other animals told her they'd take a pass on the whole work thing, frankly. 

Then when the bread was finished all the farm animals wanted some and the little red hen told them all to fuck off.

The moral: Hard work turns people into bitter, petty tyrants who hate everyone.

Kind of a dick, tbh

Checkmate, optimists.

People are always saying "don't be down, lots of people have it worse than you!"

So by that same logic "don't be so happy, lots of people have it better than you."

Checkmate, optimists.